9/05/2014

Mostly Not Doll Related - Joan Rivers


Laughter is the best medicine and sometimes it's the only medicine within reach. This isn't doll related but Joan often joked that she was mostly plastic with regards to the surgeries on her face.

She was a role model.




Joan Rivers mocked Kristen Stewart’s threat to sue her during a characteristically no-holds-barred appearance on HuffPost Live on Tuesday.
The comedian waved around a doll, joking that she wants Stewart to show her where “she did or did not touch her director.”
Rivers defended her jokes about Stewart (and others) in her new book, saying she just wants “to make people laugh,” and that anyone who doesn’t find her funny should go elsewhere.

It's horrifying to think that the medical center may have played a role in the death of the comedienne. Supposedly she was healthy when she entered the facility on foot. It was not an emergency procedure or anything like that.

Let's remember the some of the funniest lines:

1. It’s been so long since I made love, I can’t remember who gets tied up.
2. I like colonic irrigation because sometimes you find old jewellery.
3. I was just reading about the new Lindsay Lohan diet, which is all liquid. 80 proof.
4. My love life is like a piece of Swiss cheese. Most of it’s missing, and what’s there stinks.
5. I’ve worked with Angelina Jolie. She saw a sign that said ”WET FLOOR” one time, and she did.
6. I had a cold and my doctor recommended coffee enemas. I can never go back to Starbucks…
7. I knew I was an unwanted baby when I saw that my bath toys were a toaster and a radio.
8. I said to my husband, “Why don’t you call out my name when we’re making love?” He said, “I don’t want to wake you up.”
9. I hate thin people; “Oh, does this tampon make me look fat?”
10. I have no sex appeal, which kills me. The only way I can ever hear heavy breathing from my husband’s side of the bed is when he’s having an asthma attack.
11. I was the last girl in Larchmont, NY to get married. My mother had a sign up: ‘Last Girl Before Freeway.’
12. I have so little sex appeal my gynecologist calls me “sir”.
13. I have so little sex appeal my gynecologist examines me by telephone.

3 comments:

  1. She has made me laugh so much. RIP Joan. Thanks for sharing these funny lines - she makes me laugh still.

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  2. She was a funny lady. Such terrible news.

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  3. This was one celebrity death that really hits hard, not only because I have been a fan for so long, but because she has been a part of my life on a weekly basis through Fashion Police. She brought a lot of laughter to people, which is what she enjoyed.

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